No, no you idiot, connect the orange wire to the YELLOW socket. Wait, we’re on air?!
*Chair shuffling intensifies*
Good morning/afternoon/evening/night depending on which part of the milky-way you live in or even if it’s under a rock. We’re the Federal News, you’re number 1 source of information(this is arguable).
- Governor of Crescentia resigns?
- Mysterious ship disappearance.
- Hostile negotiations(in relation to ship issue).
- Tyrant denied.
- Officials are calling this the most shocking turn of events since the Imperials banned weed. As of Four P.M last afternoon, the Governor of Crescentia in light of the riots and civil unrest mysteriously tendered his resignation, though the Government by itself seems unwilling to discuss any details about the matter, the timing seems suspicious. Even more alarming is that the resignation was submitted out of the blue, the Governor made no attempts to discuss it with his close colleagues or even advisers. “He just started acting weird and then the next afternoon, his resignation was sent to the council.” Said Hugh, Senior Adviser to Governor Bradley.
- In other news, a Lavinian ship commanded by Praetor Sigmar has been announced missing. Contact with the ship was allegedly lost when it suffered a generator malfunction, at this point its communications remained unresponsive until one hour later, they turned back only filled with just white noise, then silence again. A Federal scout ship, the U.F.N Canvas reports seeing the Praetor’s ship being devoured by a warp storm and then exploding. Why the ship exploded in a warp storm remains a mystery. However foul play is suspected. Evidence is being transferred as we speak.
- Following up with the disappearance and possible destruction of the Praetor’s Capital ship, the Lavinian Legion stated that Sigmar’s loss would not be a great one, that in the past few years he had grown more and more corrupt, eventually poisoning the minds of his peers. An Interstellar meeting was held between numerous delegates of both factions, however the United Federal Republic denies any prior knowledge of Sigmar’s rather low reputation. However this peaceful conversation turned near violent when the delegation of the Alliance of Free Stars began making hostile accusations, stating that the U.F.R was somehow involved in the disappearance, due to the obvious lack of proof. The meeting was shut down to avoid any unnecessary conflict and the matter left unresolved.
- Citizens across Aelara, Mars and New Greece celebrate today as Anti-Tyrant day, the U.F.R has agreed to make this an official holiday, celebrating the denial on the motion in regards to letting past founder Jason back into the fold. As a direct result, riots have automatically stopped, trade has resumed as usual and the Republic is functioning as usual. Though the threats of war from numerous affiliates are being considered by various Founder level personnel. Citizens are advised to merely keep calm and go about their daily routines as if nothing is happening. The President reassured the public by announcing Tridents involvement in maintaining peace and security.